I need to go and get myself some stronger medication. Cough syrup doesn’t help anymore. It only helped me to sleep for three hours. Spent a long time in the washroom trying to clear the shit out of my system after that. Please please let me pick up some Thorazine. I need it so so badly. I’ve already packed my stuff and written my letters. It’s time to go to a faraway place. Please let me get my hands on the strongest sleep medication and anti-depressants out there.
Yes, it’s really selfish to die. Selfish to die to find out if someone loves you. Way too selfish. But this is the only way to end all the pain. This is the only way I know how. This is the only way to stop all the tears at night. All the hurt will be no more. I’m sorry I’m selfish, I really am.
So please I just need to get my hands on the medication and my plan is perfect.
-XIII
(via thatslove)
I need a lot of these right here and right now. All my bottles are empty. I need more, I need so much more of it. I don’t wanna wake ever, ever, again.
-XIII
(Source: whtevvr)
If it stopped, will you miss me?
I won’t miss me. But I’ll most definitely miss everything about you.
(via shirophine)
lovequotesrus:
Photo Courtesy: factsaboutyou
And it tears me apart one too many times. I think I’ve used up all of my nine lives. I have no more left. I don’t know how to cope with my aching heart and crying fits anymore. I’ll just curl up each night and cry myself to sleep. I may laugh and look fine and dandy to everyone around me. But the pain I feel, it’s worse than being in an inferno. It doesn’t burn you from the outside. It’s burning me inside out. Soon, all that’s going to be left of me is an empty shell, that will crumble to dust at the slightest touch of the wind. And maybe then, I’ll really be ashes in the wind. And I’ll be forevermore, beside you. (:
-XIII
I’d like to grab a white stallion. Fall asleep on it. And let it take me to a faraway place. White stallions are the ocean waves, take me into the calm depths of the ocean and let me feel no more of this worldly pain.
-XIII
(Source: Flickr / maggielochtenberg, via papertissue)
I have ice in my veins, blood in my eyes, hate in my heart and love in my mind.
Yeah. If only I had all that, I’d be motherfucking awesome. (Y)
-XIII
Just the way I am. Little sinister me.
Need of some morphine.
Let’s see. My day today was sorta boring. Studied with Viv at the airport. Had a toffee nut latte with a pathetic swirl of whipped cream. I love Starbucks, period. Oh and I had a chocolate Danish later. Taught Viv statistics (can’t believe some of the dumb things we did cause the questions were all over the place), but otherwise I think she understood whatever I said. Uh I hope. With all the coffee, I’m still sleepy. Goodness gracious. Maybe it’s from all the stupid panic attacks. Le sigh. I need my heart to stop if not, I think I really might die from heart failure or cardiac arrest. Yay!
Oh and some china arse stepped on my toes, well STEPPED is an UNDERSTATEMENT. More like he SQUASHED MEH TOES. And didn’t even APOLOGIZE. So I kinda glared at him and he glared back and said, “See what see!” in hokkien to me. Hey ass, I may look like your average banana kid, and sound like one, but I can speak Hokkien, Teochew and Cantonese as well as your grandma does! So I got pissed and said really loudly, that SOME PEOPLE ARE SO BLIND, EVEN MY GRANDMA HAS BETTER EYESIGHT in Hokkien. Piss of ass. Piss off. Seriously, can’t understand these people. Will saying “sorry” kill you? Gosh.
Well. I laughed a little today. Ham ham. AHAHAHA. And well, J totally burst my bubble. You suckkkkkk. Thanks so much. Shall go and dig a hole in the ground and bury myself in it now. Upset x infinity.
I need some high octane glitz and glamour in life. But more importantly, I need you. (: and thanks Gen dear, for your sweet text, “You too sam, have faith, keep sane and healthy. We shall explode into freedom (somehow) after As.” Its my second shot I don’t think it’ll be any better but at least I can go to NTU if it all fails. Le sigh again.
Need things to work out. Need you so bad. Need only you so badly.
-XIII
Haha I’ve found someone to kill me. (Y) I have the most awesome best friend, period. THIS IS EVEN CHEAPER THAN FUCKING EUTHANASIA!
Hope it’s painless man. (: I swear she’s obsessed with five dollars.
-XIII
imagequotes:
- - COME b a c k (by sealed pearl ♥)
Would you ever come back to me? What I can I do so that you’d come back? I really need you so bad. To the extent that even the darkness scares me no more.
Every day with you around me, makes me a little stronger. A little better. A little more sane. But sometimes, a step closer to death as well. What a selfish fool I am. But it’s all because I’ve sold my soul to loving you.
-XIII
I’m so tired of all the heartache. I need to be alright soon. It gets worse when you leave for periods of time. I really need this chance. Please choose me.
-XIII
(Source: peaceloveandwolfpack, via shirophine)
I need to be okay. I need to stop the hurt. I need to be strong. But I am so exhausted, I can’t control my emotions anymore.
I am desperately clinging on to the broken pieces of me. I’m so tired I’m just breaking down again. And again. And again. Make me strong please honey. Make me strong and good again. I’m tired of the rain. I am so so tired. I really really need you so fucking badly.
-XIII
